A few months ago I was reading through the book of Acts and a passage stood out to me and I’ve been meditating on it ever since and therefore it warrants a blog post. As I was reading chapter nine I came to verse 16 and I had to pause. Did Jesus really say that? Dots were connecting in my brain as I read this verse that day.
Acts 9:15-16 says, “But the Lord said unto him, Go thy way: for he is a chosen vessel unto me, to bear my name before the Gentiles, and kings, and the children of Israel: (and here’s where I paused) For I will shew him how great things he must suffer for my name’s sake.”
I think it would be beneficial for me to back up a few years to when I had this other thought. Does God chose some people for suffering to bring Him glory? I knew a young woman in my church at the time whose family had experienced so much loss in such a short amount of time. They were suffering… yet, always giving glory to God. I knew of young women close to my age who were barren or experiencing multiple miscarriages and longing for children or more children in the case of miscarriage… yet, always giving glory to God. I’m sure there were many others suffering around me that I was not aware of at the time but these few instances are what spawned the question in my mind.
Since then, I’ve always been on the lookout for an answer in Gods word. I’ve read through my Bible a couple times since then so I’ve obviously read this passage but the Holy Spirit works in ways I don’t always understand completely.
To put these verses in context I’ll paraphrase what’s happening. Saul was a Pharisee looking to put an end to all of the new believers in Jesus Christ. He believed strongly in the law so much so that he was willing to hunt down Christians to have them put to death for spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ. On his way to Damascus, Saul heard the voice of Jesus saying to him, “Saul, Saul, why persecutest thou me?” From then he was converted to a Christian but Jesus had blinded him. Jesus told him to go into the Damascus and wait there for further instruction. Three days later a disciple named Ananias had a vision telling him to go to Saul (now Paul) to put hands on him so Saul could receive his sight. Ananias, not knowing of Paul’s conversion, doesn’t want to go heal him because he knows of the persecutions. And then we come to Jesus’s reply that Paul was chosen by Him and that he must suffer for his names sake.
So, knowing where my original question had stemmed from maybe now you’ll be able to share in more of my ah ha moment.
I believe now that God does choose people for suffering but not just for the sake of suffering. For the gospel to spread and for the glory of God to be magnified. Suffer in this passage according to the Strongs Concordance means, ‘to experience a sensation or impression (usually painful).’ So, that thorn in Paul’s side that he’s prayed for God to take away and He decides not to. I’m not surprised because Paul was chosen to bear Gods name before Gentiles, kings, and the children of Israel and he must suffer for the sake of Gods name to be heard.
Now, when I think of the Christian who is suffering I’m moved to have more compassion. I can find myself in the position of Jobs friends if I’m not mindful of my thoughts. I can lean more towards thinking that there must be a hidden sin or God must just be mad at them (sounds ridiculous but I’m being honest). When I read this passage it’s clear to me that God can and does choose people for suffering.
I wonder if that’s you reading this that feels you’ve been chosen to suffer. I can’t imagine the day to day feelings you might be experiencing but can I just encourage you in this truth; God is bigger. He knows your struggles, He knows your need, your weakness, He literally knitted you together in your mothers womb, He knew all of your days before you were even a twinkle in your mothers eye, He knows your diagnosis, He knows your pain, He knows your loneliness… He’s bigger than these feelings. I’m not saying that aren’t real but God says give thanks in ALL things. Find something to give thanks for in the midst of your suffering!
My husband and I have experienced multiple miscarriages but praise God that through those losses we had the hope of heaven! Praise God that those children never knew the chaos of this sin-filled world. It’s ok to acknowledge the physical pain, the illness, the loss. But don’t sit in it. Take your thoughts captive and under the obedience of Christ and suffer for His names sake just as Paul did.
The Millennial Mom 
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